一位貌似耶穌的小偷（Horácio Salinas 飾）從兒童們的石塊擊打中醒來(lái)，與一個(gè)無(wú)手無(wú)腳的侏儒結(jié)伴進(jìn)入城市。城中正進(jìn)行一場(chǎng)瘋狂的慶典，一些人被殺死，鳥雀從他們的槍口中飛出，大量蟾蜍穿著印第安人以及歐洲殖民者的服裝在混戰(zhàn)中被炸的粉碎。小偷從幾個(gè)羅馬士兵打扮的人手中接過十字架，又被他們將自身的形象制造成無(wú)數(shù)模型……小偷在眾目睽睽下爬上了一座能生產(chǎn)黃金的高塔，塔內(nèi)的術(shù)士從小偷的糞便中提煉出了金子。術(shù)士用占星術(shù)確認(rèn)了幾位門徒，他們是生產(chǎn)面具的商人、武器商、藝術(shù)家、玩具商、政府顧問、軍隊(duì)長(zhǎng)官和建筑師，七人分別代表不同的行星。術(shù)士把這些掌控國(guó)家的人物積聚一起，拋棄一切之后向傳說(shuō)中的圣山進(jìn)發(fā)尋找不朽的秘密。

 故事圍繞著一個(gè)“來(lái)自未來(lái)的人”（山姆·洛克威爾 飾）展開，他來(lái)到洛杉磯的一家小餐館，在那里他必須招募一群心懷不滿的顧客，與他一起完成一個(gè)為期一晚、跨越六個(gè)街區(qū)的任務(wù)，以拯救世界免受流氓人工智能的終極威脅。

　　南、歐、尼克、竇和梅是五個(gè)剛畢業(yè)沒多久的新新人類，出于對(duì)影視行業(yè)和靈異題材的熱愛，他們拍攝了一支鬧鬼廢墟的小短片。雖然沒有獲得相關(guān)公司的認(rèn)可，但一經(jīng)上傳后很快得到網(wǎng)友的廣泛關(guān)注和支持。在此之后，專門拍攝靈異題材的制作公司鬼域（Ghost Land）聯(lián)系到他們，邀請(qǐng)三個(gè)人前往端島拍攝。端島是位于日本長(zhǎng)崎一座形狀酷似軍艦的島嶼，19世紀(jì)末曾憑借豐富的礦藏贏得某大型企業(yè)的關(guān)注，但是隨著能源方式的改編如今已變成遍布廢墟的荒島。　　無(wú)所顧忌的年輕人們登上端島，期間還遭遇傳說(shuō)中的美女美子的鬼魂，他們就此厄運(yùn)纏身……

　　After breaking out of a rehabilitation zoo, Frankie, a squirrel with all the angles, returns to his forest. He learns from his dim-witted best friend, Cody, a porcupine and street-con, that while he was in lock-up, the entire forest was picked clean by The A.C.O.R.N.S. Institute (Alternative Cosmetic Oils for Regenerative Natural Skin-care). No acorn was left behind. With winter just around the corner, it's a potentially devastating blow to all forest critters. So, Frankie has no choice but to bust into the brand new, state-of-the-art, rodent-proof A.C.O.R.N.S. Processing Plant and take back all of the acorns! Though a seemingly impossible heist, success would not only save the lives of his forest friends, but it would also give Frankie a chance to win back the love of his life, Lola, a local "show squirrel." Sadly, Lola has been burnt by too many of Frankie's false promises in the past. With the support of Frankie's old mentor, Mr. Bellwood, a wealthy badger, Frankie and Cody assemble a team of top notch "crackers" from all over the forest, including: a bat named Fly Boy, a top notch munitions expert; Raitch, a computer hacking albino snake, who never allows her lack of appendages to get in the way; Edsy a tiny "family frog," whose ability to freeze himself solid for days on end without harm is invaluable; a germophobic French rat named Liam, who can collapse his skeleton to get into any space; Chinese father-daughter pangolins named Pango and Lin, the best diggers in the forest; and Bellwood's hedgehog butler, Oscar who knows how to get his hands on anything the crew needs. With winter knocking at their door, Frankie and his crew have only three days to prepare and execute this unprecedented heist. When they learn that the processing of their forest's acorns has been pushed up a day, Lola's refusal to participate leaves Frankie and his crew one critter short. With everything on the line, Frankie and his crew of Animal Crackerz set out to pull off the biggest heist in animal history!